Two adult women in One house DON"T MIX!

Well it is about that time. I am an adult, and after talking with my mother we both agreed that it is time for me to get myself together to go out on my own. It was a hard decision for both of us because I really love being close to my mom and she considers me to be her best friend. Unfortunately two women in one house can get a bit strained. It doesn't help that we have one car, one computer, one television, one sound system, and two tempers! As the oldest I have a definite take charge attitude, but my mom as the next to youngest in her family doesn't. This translates into my mom forcing herself to actively take a leadership role while I am struggling not to say anything, which often fails. I have always been one to speak my opinion (my poor mom), and as someone who has a pretty good ability to translate from man speak to woman speak and back again my family has found my communication to be helpful. Lately, however, I find myself just trying not to say anything because it all blows up in my face. I don't want to get into my parents' relationship, and I don't want to step out of my place as their daughter and my youngest brother's sister.

I need a place of my own where I don't have to worry about being out of pocket or out of luck. I need to be able to deal with raising my son without raising the hairs on my family's heads. I think one of the things that has kept me home so long is that I feel like nowhere else would really be home. I like what I call home and I don't like the idea of leaving the safest place I have ever known. I also wonder if I am going to survive. Right now I have no job, no degree, and a baby. I want stability. I am not leaving home right away, but I know it needs to happen. I just hope that I can stand. I don't know how I got like this. I was always independent before I got pregnant. I really wish I could be myself again. Prayer is my friend right now because two women in one house don't mix.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

5 things that could keep you from getting so angry

So I find that there are certain things that when done make for a much better day than when I don't do them.  As a single mom sometimes it gets hard to do these and then everything seems to be a bigger ordeal for me. Lord help me to do better with that.  I would tell you don't judge me, but I know you are going to do it anyway so I will say please be gracious toward me.  1.  Start the snowball of positive thinking : For me this means prayers of thanks, reading my Bible, listening to positive music, writing a letter to God or to myself, even watching some Veggie Tales (what do you know about those Veggies?)  with my son sometimes.   The reality is there is enough negative that comes at me; why would I invite anything other than a flood of positive truth into my mind and my life? This is the day that the Lord has made I will rejoice and be glad in it...or else!!!  haha just kidding (sort of) 2.  Wash up!: Remember when I said be gracious?...
Read more

Mr. Sandman Where are you?

I was told that by 6 months old or so my son should be effectively sleeping through the night. Well, Tomorrow is his first birthday and he has already woken up twice...make that three times because he woke up while I was writing this! I really miss sleeping and I want my little one to get sleep too. He wakes up every two or three hours to nurse. I try to get him to go back to sleep, but a baby who is standing up and pulling on the side of his crib isn't going back to sleep easily. I sing, swing, shush , and attempt to swaddle, but he won't have any of it. Sometimes I let him cry his way back to sleep, but it only last for about a half hour before he reawakens more determined than before. The screaming wears on my nerves and the lack of sleep is wearing on my days. Some days I think "This is it. This is my life now. I will never feel rested again, and I will never be fully alert again." I expected to lose sleep when I found out I was pregnant. I expected to be tired, b...
Read more

I have a dream

I used to dream all the time that I was witnessing to people.  People would ask me questions and I would begin to speak about the goodness of the Lord, and how Jesus was the solution to all of their problems or desires.  I feel anointed to be having those dreams again.  Maybe someone needs these words.  I talk about my journey of faith, but maybe you haven't begun that journey yet so let me tell you about Jesus.  Jesus is the Christ, the savior of the world, the messiah, the only begotten son of God.  Jesus is God in humanity. He came down to earth, lived a human life, did miraculous things to show people who he was and how much he loved them.  Jesus felt every human emotion that any of us have ever felt. Jesus taught us how to live as people of God.  Then he died so that we wouldn't have to be separated from him anymore.   You see sin separates us from God because he is holy.  We all have sinned therefore we all should be separated fro...
Read more